Mr. Census, you owe me. Big.

I try very hard to bite my tongue restrain my fingers here.  Of course it’s my blog and I’ll say what I want to, but generally speaking, I’m a peaceful person.  I don’t want to argue with you in real life, and I especially don’t want to argue with you in cyberspace.  Occasionally I can’t help myself, but for the most part I think I show a great deal of restraint.

Besides, I’ve found that my political beliefs are not well understood or widely held, and I grow weary of endless explanations and defenses. 

{I would like to reiterate, in case you haven’t heard this from me two dozen times already, that liberal and Democrat are not necessarily synonymous, nor are conservative and Republican.  Four entirely different words.  Different meanings.  Despite whatever Fox News, CNN, Jon Stewart, and Glenn Beck would lead you to believe. Not. The. Same.}

Anyway.

This is one of those moments where I don’t stop myself.  Because I am seriously ticked.

Have you heard about the Census?

[If you say no, this might be where I go all crazy on you and tell you to get out of the country]

Have you heard about it because it is in our constitution? 

Or have you heard about it because you, too, have gotten approximately 37 mailings, notes from school, and a seemingly endless barrage of television and radio advertisements?

Actually, come to think of it, I bet most Americans have read the stupid reminder postcards (this month alone) more often than they have read the actual constitution in their entire lifetime. 

<sigh>

But national ignorance aside, come on.  Seriously.  The census is pretty darn basic.  And self-explanatory.  What do you think it says about our average intelligence that the government felt the need to spend $423 million dollars telling us to fill out the form?

NOT A TYPO.

$423 million dollars spent on census communications, which includes $85 million for printing and mailing the reminders alone. 

If I were a swearing kind of gal, this is the spot where you’d find the profanity. 

I’m not a mathematical type of gal, either, but I decided to stretch myself a bit here, just in case you are on my wavelength. 

Leaving the rest of the mind-boggling communications budget out of the equation, let’s tackle that $85 million.  Our home received 4 letters from school in my children’s backpacks, 2 letters telling us that ‘the census is coming!’, and 1 follow-up reminder to fill out the census (after I’d already mailed it in, thankyouverymuch.)  I pretty much found the ‘answer these questions’ blurb at the top of the census form itself to be sufficient instruction.  I could have done without all the other crap superfluous paperwork.  So for my part, I’d like you to keep your stupid mailings, Mr. Big Government, and give me $3.63 additional back on my taxes.

Thanks.

Of course that $3.63 is an exceptionally watered down number, since it takes into consideration our entire population, whereas the census mailings are per household rather than per person.  And it also overlooks the bulk of the communications budget which frankly, I also did not need.

This chart estimates the 2010 census as a whole is costing us nearly $47 per person.  Worth noting is that our last census, in 2000, cost less than $16 per person.  Holy Inflation Batman.

How many trees died so that the government could ask me an overly intrusive, offensive, and frankly irrelevant question like ”Are your children biological or adopted?”

My children are my children.  DNA’s got nothing to do with it.

Grrrr.

I’m not a crazy fringe person.  I’m not angry about the census per se.  I know it is useful, and I know it is constitutional.  I have no quarrel there.  But I take serious issue with the enormous amount of money being spent on it.  Or more accurately, being wasted on it.

I demand a government that is more respectful of my tax dollar.  I know there is a more efficient way to do this.  But ‘efficient’ and ‘government’ don’t exactly go hand-in-hand now, do they?

Can’t wait to see how ‘health care’ pans out.

Tongue. Biting.