If all else fails, make a movie

I don’t know about you, but I have a not-small collection of photos of my children making messes.  I’ve captured Annie as an infant, happily splashing away in the dogs’ water bowl and gleefully spreading flour all over the kitchen tile.  I have hundreds of pictures of Catie and Lilly covered in food.  I have pictures of colored-on legs and arms – and sofas, and walls…

Perhaps one of the biggest baby mess pictures was captured about 2-and-a-half years ago, when Lilly was newly crawling.  I thought I was safe to leave the girls in the kitchen while I went to the bathroom.  Including hand-washing that’s what, 60 seconds? 90?  Not long.

But thinking gets you in trouble, my friends.  Especially when you are mother to a very ornery child like my Catiebug.  And besides being ornery, she’s also unlucky.  Things just happen to Catie.  Her cups spill, her plates break, she falls out of chairs.  Sometimes I fear she has a little black cloud following her around.

So yes, as an experienced mother, I certainly should have known better.  But alas, I did not.

What I saw when I exited the bathroom was nothing short of shocking.  The kind of shocking that rocks you so deeply you can’t even be angry because you’re just too stunned.

Fortunately I had the presence of mind to take pictures.

I also immediately sat down and emailed my husband.

He’s a neat freak.  Case in point, he couldn’t sleep last night.  You know that saying, ‘If mama’s cold, everyone puts on a sweater’?  Well if Daddy wants to clean, everyone has to clean.  So at about 1 am, he woke me up to clean.

And I have no more polite words to say about that, so I’ll move on.

So being a neat freak, he is constantly upset by the condition of our home.  I truly believe he has a mental image of me sitting on the couch all day, watching daytime TV, playing solitaire online, and maybe even munching on bon-bons while the children run wild.

He has no understanding or appreciation of the fact that I actually spend all day working, picking up right behind them, and this is still as good as it gets.  Suzy Homemaker I am not.

I’ll cook rings around 90% of wives, guaranteed.  But when it comes to housework, I fall miserably, pathetically short.  I readily admit this.  But it’s not like I do nothing, I just can’t figure out what to do with all of the ‘stuff’.  I can organize a room no problem, but when it comes to the daily mail, school papers, missing pieces from toys sets, broken jewelry, and-and-and, I’m at a loss.  As a result, our house isn’t dirty, but it’s perpetually cluttered.  One of us has learned to accept this, one of us has not.

So back to the day in question – I finally felt I had good tangible evidence that I do indeed clean up messes before he gets home.  My email was this:

Chris,

I was thinking about you today.  Thinking about how different our jobs are.  Thinking about what you  might be doing at that moment.

In my mind, you decided to go to the bathroom.  You have the luxury of doing that whenever you want, you know, and you get to do it all by yourself.  I don’t think you fully appreciate that simple luxury.  So I imagined you taking a leisurely stroll though the office, maybe stopping for a cup of coffee on the way back to your desk, maybe pausing to chat about last night’s game.  Chatting with a grown up, chatting without interruption, without a small child tugging on your leg.  And I imagine that when you make it back to your office, your desk probably looks pretty much the same as it did when you left it.

I don’t work from a desk – my office travels with me.  I don’t have co-workers to engage in adult conversation.  I rarely get to go to the bathroom alone and I never get a hot cup of coffee.  And I can’t leave the room unless I’ve properly occupied my subordinates, which I failed to do today.

Which is why, when I returned from approximately 90 seconds of solitude, I was greeted by this:

Don’t worry – it’s already cleaned up.  Just enjoy your day.  And when you get home, try not to give me any grief.  Believe it or not, I’ve had a day too.

My point was made nicely, and lasted for about 3 days.  Typical.

However, the picture is the crowning jewel in my kid mess photo collection.  And this week it got even more mileage, in the form of a YouTube video.  Amanda Tinney of Disney Every Day set a song to photos, and I’m happy to have contributed the perfect match for my line.  See for yourself.

So while my evidence might not have swayed my husband, at least it’s entertaining the masses on YouTube.  I’ll consider that a day’s work done.  And now back to the TV.

WTH? Wednesday

Probably won’t be an actual series or anything, but the title’s pretty darn catchy, isn’t it? Thankyouverymuch.

I started this post months ago.  You know, back when I was still blogging with regularity.

Anyway, I’d sort of forgotten about it until last week when Lilly and I were watching her very favorite show (at the moment).  She’s moved out of her Little Einsteins phase and is now solidly a Handy Manny kinda girl.  When she saw him in Disney she nearly cried with delight!

We had to wait in line to see him 3 times.

And she hugged him so long and hard we eventually had to pry her out of his arms!

Overall, I’m fine with it.  The show is cute enough and not overly annoying, though I do find playboy Wilmer Valderrama an odd choice for preschool programming…but I digress.  So Manny, thumbs up.  I’m cool with you.  But what is going on in your town man?  I have never watched an episode without a thousand questions running through my head.  So like any stay-at-home mom with way too much time on her hands curious woman would do, I googled for some answers.

Which I didn’t really get, unfortunately.

But I did find a whole slew of other socially repressed curious moms like myself, wondering the very same things.  So at least now I know I’m not alone in my craziness.  See?

- Are the people of Sheetrock Hills illiterate? Why does Manny’s store just have a big picture of his head instead of a name?

- Is Kelly a closet socialist? When she closes her store to help Manny with a project, he protests and tells her she should go back to the store. Her response: “Community comes first Manny.”  Hmmmm…

-Is Sheetrock Hills is a barter society?  They certainly don’t ever exchange money. Manny never pays Kelly for anything from her store, and I’m not sure I’ve ever heard money so much as mentioned. Kelly stands there next to a cash register that never gets opened, leading me to believe it’s all a farce. So if money isn’t exchanged, how do you think Manny pays her for the goods? Sure, he could have a house account. Or is he paying her in other ways? They’re awfully flirty.

- How do the tools have eyebrows? They are just suspended in the middle of nowhere up there. Are they fake? What holds them in place?  If they are real, do they grow?  Out of what?  Why do they even need eyebrows?

- And speaking of the tools, they always seem excited to eat. How does that work exactly? They have no hands to hold the food. And where is their digestive tract?  That food has to be going somewhere.

- Why does Manny never remove his hat? What’s he hiding under there?  Ditto the gloves.

-What’s the backstory on Mr. Lopart? He’s always snubbing Manny but somehow I think he’s not a bad guy, just misunderstood. Do you think he insists on doing it all himself because he’s jealous of Manny and trying to keep up appearances, or because his intellectual growth was stunted and he’s the emotional equivilent of my 2-year-old, insisting to do it “my OWN self!”

-And is there any actual doubt that Mr. Lopart is gay? Or are we to believe he’s asexual? And either way, isn’t he a bit stereotypical? A middle-aged single man, living with his mom, unnaturally attached to his cat, with a funny voice and forever seen in a cardigan sweater. Couldn’t we be a bit more original here?

-The gay thing makes me wonder if there is an unspoken push to be PC in this show.  I mean, we’ve got the hispanic majority (check!), the gay man (check!), the woman-in-a-man’s-profession (check!), the Asian family (check!), the Indian family (check!), and various kids in wheelchairs (check!) always in the backround.  I think this town might be a gated community to keep out the plain old white bread.

-Which then leads me to wonder, where is this place? The US? Mexico? Puerto Rico? or…?

-Are the kids in Sheetrock Hills total jerks who destroy their parents marriages?  Why does everyone seem to be from a single parent household?   There’s no Mr. Lopart, no Senora Sanchez, no Mr. Portillo.  Something is amiss. (PS-Don’t freak out about the kids crack-it’s an SNL joke)

-Why does no one, ever, no matter where they go, ever seem taken aback by talking tools?  They don’t even mention it!  How is that not just a little bit odd?  I’d freak right the heck out if a flashlight ever hopped up and talked to me.

Yeah, I know I’m weird for thinking this much about it, but when you see something for an hour a day, every day, for months on end, I just can’t help but go there.  If you ever figure any of this out (or know a writer with answers over in Handy Manny land), I’d love to hear from you.  I need to get these things out of my mind so I can go back to pondering more important matters.  Like why the Little Einsteins parents aren’t being investigated for child neglect.

So I have this friend…

and she’s totally amazing.  Rock-your-world, lift-your-spirits, where-have-you-been-my-whole-life amazing.  I’m so blessed and so grateful for her, and today I need to brag about her a little.

• She’s smart. So smart, and not just in a brainy factoid kinda way (although she’s got that book smart thing down too), but in a clever, resourceful kind of way.  She approaches things in a way that I wouldn’t ever think of, and she gives me the best and sneakiest tips on how to get great seats, hard to snag reservations, and the very best deals.  (I so never knew that you could get free groceries!)  How cool is that?
• She is strong. Strong in a way that I find both inspirational and intimidating.  Life has thrown out some curveballs and she didn’t bother dodging them, she swung her bat and knocked them out of the park.  It’s true that sometimes you have no choice about what comes your way, but you always have a choice about how you react and her reactions are remarkable.  Where some would wallow in self-pity, she forged ahead.  When some would wail about the depths of despair, she created a new normal.  She has a beautiful and blessed life because of her beautiful and blessed heart, and I am in awe.
• She’s funny.  Wickedly funny.  She can make me laugh like few people can, and who doesn’t need more of that in their life?  How wonderful is that!  Humorless people are such a drag.
• She’s a great writer.  She writes in a way that instantly connects with you, across time and distance and differences.  She makes you feel exactly what she is feeling, and she has a unique way of blending raw emotion and sarcastic wit that is really unforgettable.  She’s made me laugh and cry out loud more times than I can count, and she’ll be doing it for you one day too. I’ll give you a heads up when her book is published.  I hear it’s fantastic. Not that I’ve been able to read it yet… ahem. Moving on.
• She’s thoughtful. Kind. Generous. She is a giver, of herself, her time, her resources, her emotions.  She is such a loving, caring person and she doesn’t give herself enough credit for it.
• She is beautiful, inside and out.  Her self-deprecating humor makes mention of a blueberry muffin, but pay that no mind; anyone who has seen her knows that she’s a hot mama. If you don’t believe me, just ask the broom boy.
• She is honest.  She’ll tell you what you need to hear no matter what, even when it’s unpleasant.  She’ll talk about the embarassing stuff that only the very best of friends will talk about.  She’ll tell you what she really thinks, no holds barred.
• She gets me.  She just gets me, no words necessary.  Of course we do share lots of words, because when we know we’re thinking the same thing it’s really nice to be able to share that. Rant a little, laugh a little – ok, laugh a lot.  People who get it so easily and comfortably are hard to find, and I have The Mouse to thank for bringing this one into my life.  Another way that Disney has been good to me.

Happy birthday, my forever friend. I love you.

Excuses, excuses

Oh blogosphere, how I’ve missed you so.

A few weeks ago we were leaving for a Disney vacation, and then I sort of dropped off the face of the Internet.  I know.  I’m sorry.  It’s been crazy crazier than usual.  I will update properly on our vacation, pictures and all, but first here are the obligatory explanations for my prolonged absence.

One new-to-us experience we had on this vacation was ‘having a child get sick in Disney World.’  I don’t really want to repeat that one.  I don’t know exactly how it happened, but long story short, Lilly was infected with e coli.  She (and I) spent the second half of the vacation pretty much tied to the resort room, and she was hospitalized the week we got home.  Not fun. 

And then came Easter.  And after she was released, my parents went away for a few days, which left me and my unruly brood in charge of our website (total plug for Garden Party Teas).  I love, love, LOVE working with the site, but it’s not easy to do with the amount of ‘help’ I get from my 2 & 3 year old daughters.  Anyway, we’ve been very busy lately – it’s Tea Party season, don’t you know?  I’m grateful for our customers, but it does keep us on our toes!

After all of that died down, I came back to blog.  I had very good intentions.  Unfortunately, though, a spammer sidetracked me.  I had to weed through and delete literally thousands of spam comments.  When I finally got that tedious task off of my plate, I checked my email, only to discover that every single comment also generated an email notificaion, so yet again I had to weed through them all.  UGH!  It was such a long, annoying process that by the time I finished (several days later), I had no desire to blog!

Then we had a crazy soccer week (I’m the coach of my daughters’ rockin’ U-6 team), busy school week (I volunteer there on a regular basis – so fun!), yada, yada, yada.  And now my poor Mom has hurt her back and is unable to do much of anything but lie in pain.  When it rains it pours I suppose!

So there you have it, the list of excuses reasons why I was unable to join the land of the living for a while.  But never fear, I’m back baby, with lots to talk about, lots to show you, and a few really awesome giveaways in the works!  Woo-hoo!

Bye y’all!

I’m gone! I really need to get back to what is near and dear to my heart.

It’s been way too long.

The castle is beckoning me to the Magic Kingdom:

The Tree of Life is calling me in for a show:

Spaceship Earth is waiting to be explored:

The Sorcerer’s Hat is full of magic:

The Flower and Garden Festival is in full swing:

And none of us can wait to hear “Por favor mantangese alejardo de las puertas”

First we’ll go by plane:

And then we’ll go by bus:

First we’ll visit our home-away-from-home:

and then we’ll hop over to the convenience of a monorail resort:

We’ll likely enjoy the pools:

and probably the water parks too:

There’s sure to be lots of good food:

and maybe some special desserts:

We’ll have lots of good times:

and see some old friends:

and definitely enjoy some ice cream:

Good times are waiting to be had. Now I just need to finish packing.

Have a great 10 days – I know I will!

I’m back!

Exhausted, half deaf, crazy busy, and somewhat more scatterbrained than usual, but back nonetheless. It was a great long weekend in Disney, and I so enjoyed meeting the members of the 2009 WDW Moms Panel. They are a really great group and I know that the panel will be in good hands.

Pictures will be coming soon…this weekend I hope. I am busy playing catch up on all those Christmas presents I decided to make. (Someone please remind me of this next year, or else I’ll do it all again) Nella, if you are reading this I send out my sincerest apologies. I had something finished for Niilo weeks ago, but I am STILL not done with yours. Looks like you’ll be getting a belated gift this year. Which of course, to anyone who knows me, this comes as no surprise.

Eardrum rupture did close so no surgery required – woo-hoo! Tons of fluid in both ears though, which is why I can’t hear. I am on round 3 of steroids and round 4 of antibiotics right now, and still a prescription decongestant, so hopefully one day soon I will be hearing again! Voice is almost back as well. I think the hearing thing is annoying sometimes, mainly when I have to leave the house, but at home I find it rather handy to not be able to hear the children at all times. Is that terrible to admit?

Ok, enough of my mini-update – I’m back to sewing now. Oh and before I forget, Allison from A Slice of Heaven is my CARES winner. Congratulations Allison! It will be mailed out shortly.

Enjoy your weekend!

Too.Sick.To.Blog.

I feel horrible. What’s that phrase, death warmed over? I feel like death still cold. I have a sore throat, body aches, and chills. And since my beloved Tylenol Flu was pulled from the market a few years ago, I’m left without a fix. Nothing else works as well.

I am so miserable. And the kids are sick too, of course. Lilly saw the doc this morning, diagnosed with double ear infection. Also got a script for eye cream, as she has a very gunky gross discharge. Which Catie has developed this afternoon as well. At least I don’t have that.

What I do have is a deadline. I am Disney bound on Friday morning, and I need this crud to be gone before then.

And now I’m going back to lay on the couch and feel terrible.

A very Disney halloween

For the first time ever we used these really cute Disney jack-o-lantern patterns. They are cute, and surprisingly easy. Nest year I’ll buy a battery powered cutter rather than doing it all by hand though.

The last one was after trunk-or-treating. Yes, I know, I still haven’t posted pictures. Behind as usual!

Deja Vu all over again

Last year at this time I was anxiously awaiting an email from Disney, and crossing my fingers that it would bring good news and carry me into the third round. Fast forward a year, and I’m on the other side of that fence. It did indeed bring good news, and now I am watching the next round of applicants await their emails.

They began to get the good news yesterday (a day earlier than we did last year, though their interviews are Tuesday and Wednesday instead of Monday and Tuesday like they were for us). It’s been so exciting to wait with them…and nerve-wracking all over again! I don’t know why, but I still feel it vicariously. I’m so excited for next year’s panel that I haven’t had time to feel sad about our tenure coming to an end, which is great. Because it really is sad!

Laura used her Moms Panel position as a stepping stone for a whole new life – new town, new job. Have I mentioned she’s now a cast member? WOW! So exciting. Chris could transfer with his company to Tampa, but I don’t think that would be a workable commute for me! lol

So for those who don’t already know, round 3 is here, and I suspect that the 2009 Moms Panelists might be announced late next week. I hope so, for their sake. It would be pure torture to wait all weekend for the results!

Good luck everyone. Faith, Trust, and Pixie Dust!

Just one more reason to love the mouse

The Disney Moms Panel opportunity has been wonderful for me in many ways. Sure, there’s the obvious honor of it all, the good fortune to be chosen, the excitement over our rewards, the many ways Disney has ‘plussed up’ my life, the magical memories, the daily pleasure of helping others plan their first Disney vacations…not to mention the micro-celebrity status. So yeah, of course that’s fabulous. And all in all, it’s more than I ever imagined. Certainly more than I dreamed would happen to me!

But beyond all of those things is the biggest gift I’ve gotten from Disney, and I am so thankful. I have made a wonderful friend named Darcie. I’ve bragged about her fabulousness here before (if anyone was paying attention), but today I need to do it again. Today dear wonderful Darcie sent me a present.

Not only was she thoughtful enough to remember my birthday, she was generous enough to send me a very lovely, very pampering present. And as if we had a telepathic connection, she knew exactly what to buy. You’d think she had flown over and peeked in my window about 2am. Because I am so desperately in need.

Now really, my ugly point-and-shoot picture aside, are those not the cutest jammies ever? I currently sport gym shorts and my husband’s old tee shirts, so this is a huge step up. And I am ever so grateful. For the cute PJs for sure (they are so going in my suitcase tomorrow too!), but more importantly for the gift that is Darcie in my life.

Thank you so much. Thank you for being so sweet and so thoughtful. Thank you for being such an awesome, inspirational person. Thank you for always knowing the right thing to say, and for saying what you really believe no matter what. Thank you for injecting a little pixie dust into my life. Thank you for being my friend.

She’s amazing y’all, seriously she is. I’m thinking of starting a fan club. You should hop on board now – membership slots are filling quickly.