Why I hate the Black Eyed Peas (and you should too!)
I pick Annie up from school every day. When walking out of the building today, I heard the Black Eyed Peas blaring from one of the 2nd grade classrooms. And I cringed.
I was actually so irritated that I briefly considered stopping in the room to tell the teacher why I was bothered. But considering that we have a fabulous school that allows us to request teachers, and considering that this particular teacher came highly recommended to me, and considering that I haven’t formally met her yet, and considering that she is #2 on my request list, I refrained. Something tells me that I wouldn’t make the best impression with that.
Hey lady! The BEPs are scumbags and I’m shocked and appalled that you would have them anywhere near impressionable young children. You should turn that off immediately and oh by the way I think my child might be in your class next year nice to meet you.
Not so much.
But then later I thought hey, maybe I really should have told her. Because chances are, she doesn’t know why I loathe them so. And chances are, you don’t either.
The song that really put the BEPs on the map is a little ditty called ‘Let’s Get it Started.’ Familiar? I’m sure, since it was EveryWhere for quite a while. Commercials for the NBA, Apple, various television programs, in multiple video games, and – oh yeah – on the airwaves. About 5 years ago, ‘Let’s Get it Started’ had us surrounded. Nominated for Record of the Year and Rap Song of the Year, and Grammy award winner of Best Rap Performance by a Duo or Group in 2005. By all accounts, a huge commercial success.
But what most of you don’t know was that the song wasn’t actually released in 2005. Not the first time, anyway. The first time it came out was in 2003, on the album Elephunk. And it had a different name.
“Let’s Get Retarded”
The lyrics weren’t marketable, for obvious reasons. So they changed them, and poof! Commercial success. But no one seems to know or care about what came before that.
Except me. I still care. And I think you should, too.
The R-word is beyond insensitive. It is beyond distasteful. It’s cruel. It’s demeaning.
It degrades and devalues a large group of the population, simply for their existence.
As my friend Darcie said, there are other words that were once used to belittle, based solely on the color of one’s skin. And we are quick to notice and shun those who would use such offensive language. So why is this word any different?
Don’t tell me I’m overly sensitive. Don’t tell me it’s meant to describe a way of dancing. Don’t tell me it doesn’t matter.
It matters.
I’m a Pittsburgh girl, and a die-hard Steelers fan. You may have heard that we have a bit of a crap-storm swirling right now, in the form of Ben Roethlisberger. He’s accused of assaulting several women (among other indecent behavior) and his jerseys are now worthless. Why? Because no one wants to appear supportive of such scum.
I was once a die-hard Michael Jordan fan, with an extensive collection of memorabilia. All virtually worthless now, thanks to his less-than-impressive personal life.
Tiger Woods. Need I say more?
Don’t tell me we don’t care about nasty behavior, because clearly, we do. We care when it affects women or children or wives or blacks. We just don’t seem to care when it affects the disabled.
But I care.
My daughter is in a collaborative classroom because I requested it. She spends her day with children struggling simply to speak, and she learns side by side with children that are still working on basic reading. She does this because I care. Because these children matter to me. Because I believe that these children are her equals, and I want her to know that, too. I am committed to collaborative education, and Lord willing we will continue to be a part of it.
And because of that, I am personally offended by the Black Eyed Peas. Their song isn’t funny. It isn’t cute. And it isn’t excusable.
If they apologize, I may reconsider. (Though hey, how are we faring on accepting Michael Richards’ apology? hmmm, not so good, huh?) But then again, I’m not holding my breath. It’s been due for 7 years, and there’s so sign of it yet.
So yeah, I guess I do wish I’d stopped in that classroom. Maybe the teacher doesn’t know. Certainly I hope that is the case. But she should know, and so should you.
We make statements with our money. Our dollar is often the most powerful way we can make our voices heard. And I, for one, will not allow my dollar to say that I support lyrics like these.
Please, don’t you support them either.
(If you don’t click the link, let me fill you in – they also replace ‘retarded’ with ‘dumb’, ‘cuckoo’, ‘[ignorant]‘, and ‘stupid’. And they urge you to ‘bob your head like epilepsy’. But of course ‘in this context there’s no disrespect.’ Sure.)
I’m a woman who has boycotted Rally’s for 14 years because of their oral-sex simulating Big Buford commercials, so yeah, I can totally skip your skanky music.
Black Eyed Peas, you suck.
Tags: Black Eyed Peas, boycott, Let's Get Retarded, Rally's Big Buford commercial, The R-word
Entertainment, Rants & Raves | Heather May 13, 2010
Facebook comments:
By Amanda M., May 13, 2010 @ 9:39 am
Oh my gosh, I had no idea. And we don’t have Rally’s so I am not sure what the deal is there, but I am pretty grossed out just imagining it. Burger King had a similar gross oral sex themed sandwich a few years ago. Yuck.
My older children have always been in classrooms that included children with special needs. We have been very blessed that they’ve been selected to learn side-by-side with these children. It makes me sad that in this day and age people would still refer to someone with special needs in such a bad way.
.-= Amanda M.´s last blog ..A Day of Surprises and A Redneck Makeup Case =-.
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By tracyM, May 13, 2010 @ 12:32 pm
I am a BEP fan and will continue to be. Their choice of words are offensive, as the slang term they are using to describe something else is offensive – agreed…like many slang terms out there. The phrase “Let’s Get Retarded” is a term used on the West Coast that means to go crazy on the dance floor, synonymous with “Go Dumb,” and “Get Stupid.” The colloquial meaning of “retarded”, as used in this song, refers to being very carefree and having a good time – and sometimes meaning intoxicated, similar to the colloquial use of getting “blind”, “wasted”, or “smashed”. The phrase is chanted at clubs and dances and used in everyday slang. Will I use it – no, will my kids – no…
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By Lisa, May 13, 2010 @ 1:06 pm
I keep editing because I’m not able to contain my anger at the previous commenter. Clearly she does not have a special needs child, or she wouldn’t be so passe about a demeaning word being bandied about as “everyday slang.” (And if this is everyday slang where you live, you need to freaking move) Saying that ‘retarded’ is synonymous with ‘dumb’ or ‘stupid’ is kind of the whole dang point here – NOT ACCEPTABLE. That this would be slang for ‘having fun on the dancefloor’ is a load of crap. So it would be ok if I said the N-word, and then when people were [rightly] offended I could say hey, no big deal, I just use that word to mean fun! Puh-leeze! I would be ostracized for using such a hateful and demeaning word, just as anyone using (or approving of) the R-word SHOULD BE OSTRACIZED. It’s hideous and hateful. But hey, if you’d like to talk to my 17-year-old daughter, who has been laughed at, teased, bullied, physically attacked, spat on, fed dirt, and nearly escaped molestation – come on over. Come and sit down with her, and tell her TO HER FACE that the word the kids throw at her to hurt her feelings, the word that she has come home crying over more times than I can count, the word that makes her feel ashamed and stupid and worthless – is really just for fun and means ‘CAREFREE DANCING’. Come and tell her that, if you think it’s no big deal. Look my daughter in the face and see if it’s still just dancing.
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By Jen, May 13, 2010 @ 3:15 pm
Wow. I’ve never liked the Peas, but I had no idea about this. How revolting.
I saw Whoopi Goldberg on The View one time, explaining why blacks use the N-word amongst themselves (a practice that has always botehred me). She said that they were taking ownership of a demeaning, hateful word, and making it their own. Like it couldn’t be use for hate anymore if THEY owned it. While I don’t necessarily subscribe to that theory myself, it did make some amount of sense, and is the only even partially satisfying explanation I’ve ever heard.
For that reason, if the mentally challenged community were the ones ‘taking ownership’ here and using the word as they pleased, then perhaps it would feel different. Still distasteful, but at least not belittling.
But that is not the case. This is not that community, this is about fully abled people tossing around a hateful word in casual conversation. I don’t believe one could do that with the N-word and make it in any way acceptable. If a white person used that word it wouldn’t just roll off everyone’s back, so why should this be any different?
Ignorance is still alive and well, unfortunately. It was once the norm to deny rights to women and blacks, and that has changed. I think we are in the process of changing the way homosexuals are treated. Maybe one day we will care about the disabled as well.
So sad.
But-thanks for this post. I will be forwarding it to others who also may not know (and should).
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By Debbie, May 13, 2010 @ 3:46 pm
Never been a BEP fan, but did not know this and I’m glad not one penny of our hard earned cash has ever been sent there way.
Lisa, I cannot begin to tell you how grieved I am at how your daughter has been treated. It makes me cry.
We too have always been advocates of the collaborative classroom. My oldest son wants to be a special education teacher one of these days.
Thank you for the post Heather… yes, it does matter, a lot.
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By Darcie - Such The Spot, May 13, 2010 @ 4:11 pm
Wow, tracyM. Really? Either you completely missed Heather’s point or you are just a heartless human being. Is it really okay–in whatever small world you live in–to slap degrading names on an entire population of people simply because they weren’t born with the same abilities as you? Because, as the mom of a beautiful little girl with Down syndrome, let me tell you that when people use the “R” word as a synonym for stupid, it is hurtful. Knowing that, would you still dare to condone the use of that word just because it’s part of “everyday slang?” I would certainly hope not. Just because something is widely accepted does not mean it is right. From one mother to another, shame on you if you aren’t teaching this lesson to your children. Shame on you.
Heather: the fact that you are championing this cause (in spite of not having any special needs children yourself) makes you a hero in my book. Your children will grow up all the better for having learned these lessons and learned them well. It reminds me of that country song with the lyric, “you’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.” (A lesson tracyM could clearly stand to learn)…
As for BEP, I did not know this about them until you recently told me. Since having learned it, though, I asked Jeff to remove every last one of their songs from my iPod. A group like that certainly doesn’t deserve my respect (not to mention my money!).
.-= Darcie – Such The Spot´s last blog ..Age Appropriate Chores =-.
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By Kara B., May 13, 2010 @ 4:14 pm
Did not know this. Off to delete a song on my Ipod.
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By tracyM, May 13, 2010 @ 4:20 pm
Hi Lisa – Thank you so much for your response to my comment. Clearly you don’t know much about me or my family, which is fine. I am not saying it is okay for them to say what they did, nor for anyone to say the “r” word. But I do understand why they did it – as appealing to the dance market of their album and song – and you can chose to buy or not to buy their music because of it. And just because I understand it, does not mean I condone it. There is a lot of music/movies that I do not buy because of offensive language or the such, and I am glad we have choices. I also don’t judge people, well at all, because that is not my job..and I leave that to people higher up, and believe just because they wrote one song, that they changed later, does not make them ultimately bad people….and they have since given millions to charities around the world. I believe we all need to be sensitive and to just treat people better, and anger and quick judgement isn’t going to get us there.
Great topic to bring up, Heather.
xoxo,t
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By Chrissy in real life, May 13, 2010 @ 4:24 pm
You already know how I feel, but thank you for saying this. I agree with Darcie. You *are* a hero, to many of us. An every-day, un-sung hero. Much love my friend.
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By tracyM, May 13, 2010 @ 5:33 pm
Hey Heather, I just also want to be clear that on my first comment – I was just stating the facts of where that song came from and it’s meaning – NOT that I agree with it or use that slang ever myself..I just thought it should be out there as a useful definition of what was meant in that song. Yes, the song is ridiculous – but wanted everyone to know that was the true meaning of it.
This is your blog and I totally admire what you write about and feel strongly about and don’t debate that at all. You are a dear friend and I love you to pieces. I also love that we can politely agree to disagree.
Just like I would never use or condone the ‘r’ word – I also try to refrain from using the word “hate” or judge people from a song they wrote 6 years ago with very tasteless lyrics, or from Pres. Obamas slip-ups on phrasing or Rush Limbaugh’s overuse of the ‘r’ word at times.
We all have a lot to learn about kindness, charity, tolerance and love – and I guess this post just struck a chord in me that yes, while I think the song may suck – as humans, the BEP’s don’t.
xoxo, “your heartless human being friend”
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By Heather, May 13, 2010 @ 6:25 pm
I didn’t realize the original lyrics either. And I do find it in poor taste. I’m not a huge BEP fan.
But I do remember your post about Pat Robertson and how I felt that he had “went to the well” too many times, you reminded me that thankfully our God doesn’t decide to stop forgiving us once we’ve gone to that well too many times. So in the same spirit I guess the BEP deserve the same respect-it was done years ago and fortunately the lyrics were changed. Again, didn’t know the original lyrics and like anything purposely hurtful to another would not be a part of our lives.
I have joined and passed along stopping the use of the “R” word on facebook and other media. I don’t believe in using any word that is used to insult or hurt another. No matter the word or situation. For a long time though that was the medical description, the word was used to describe a condition or disability by definition, I am guessing that has changed.
I’m sure that someone can help me out here. When did the “R” word become an offensive word? The actual definition means “to make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede”. Which would apply to those with certain developmental delays. I don’t find that hurtful. I am guessing it became more of a slang word? I’ve heard it used from one person to the next who did not have any developmental delays. This could be hurtful to those who do and their loved ones. So in the slang sense, I can see a problem. And the original lyrics to the BEP song would certainly fit. Is this how it became a problem?
This has recently become important in our home because my girls are at the age of asking questions. Unfortunately, the “R” word is what they have been taught to describe people with severe disabilities or delays. Knowing that it’s become a sensitive topic since we were young, I’ve tried to explain it better more directly related to whatever the disability is. And have encouraged them to not use the “R” word.
As for Tracy’s comment, she never said that she supported using the word to hurt others. If you know Tracy at all, that should be obvious. She was only pointing out right or wrong, the ways in which the word is used that is not related to a person with a disability.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..and now an important message… =-.
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By melanie, May 13, 2010 @ 6:34 pm
Just out of curiosity, Heather, do you also object to the music of folks who use the n-word in their music? I always thought I’d be more, what’s the word, “sheltering” with my kids and their exposure to certain words, but I’ve personally found that they do quite well knowing the difference b/t words that our family uses and the ones we don’t use. I don’t really have an opinion on the Peas, other than I do like their music. Just wondering how you feel about artists who say the n-word in some of their songs.
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By Plain Jane, May 13, 2010 @ 7:47 pm
What a bunch of jackasses. I had no idea, and that’s my excuse. From here on out, things will be different. To those who know but don’t care…well…I have nothing nice to say about that.
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By Heather - Hopelessly Flawed, May 13, 2010 @ 7:50 pm
Wow. Quite the debate this afternoon.
Lisa – My heart broke reading your words. I am so, so sorry. Hug your daughter tight for me.
Darcie & Chrissy – NOT a hero. Not even close. Just a mouthy little fighter when it comes to certain things, and this happens to be one of them.
Tracy – I know that isn’t what you meant. And for what it’s worth, my original title is in the address bar above – Why I don’t like the Black Eyed Peas (and you shouldn’t either!) – but it was too long to play nice with my plugins so that’s why it was changed. Hate isn’t the right word, but it was the only word that I could fit in. (I tried loathe
) I’m not a hateful kinda gal.
Heather – I would agree with you about the individuals that make up the group. I conciously did not call them by name because I am not making a statement about them as human beings – they are children of God (as I am), and He offers them forgiveness if they seek it. I’m making a statement about the BEPs as a musical group, and I stand by my suck description. What the group did was lousy, in many ways. And they don’t even have conviction about it. Tracy said maybe they did it to appeal to the dance club crowd, and maybe so. But it’s kind of slimy to sell out the disabled to do that, isn’t it? And if you really believe it’s no big deal, just slang, then why change the lyrics? They did it to sell out for commercial success – there was no retraction and mea culpa. It seems to be all about the record sales, either to the club by using it or the general population by not using it, but certainly neither way is about the people the word is hurting.
Mel – I’m surprised you have to ask, but YES, I absolutely object to anyone who uses the N-word, in music or in life. I don’t necessarily feel the need to shelter my children from hearing the words – I can tell them that the words are hideous and hateful and they have no place in our lives. But talk is cheap, and actions speak louder than words. If I say it is wrong but continue to listen, then what am I really teaching them? That our beliefs matter only in principle and not in practice? For me, I cannot listen to music or artists who use lyrics like that – I wouldn’t be practicing what I preach. If I believe it is wrong, and I teach my children to be loving and respectful, then I cannot condone music or artists who choose lyrics like those. Wrong is wrong, and in my house, continuing to enjoy music with offensive language is giving tacit approval.
Love to you all – but I still say a very firm NO to the Peas!
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By melanie, May 14, 2010 @ 12:55 am
Heather, I figured you didn’t listen to music with words like that. And neither do I, but I just wondered if you had a wholesale objection to the artists. I ask more as a curious parent as we feel out the boundaries with our kids. At our house, the most objectionable words our kids will hear are words like stupid or hate, and those are on tv (or gasp talk radio LOL). I just find it interesting that even when they do overhear bad words they do not repeat them, but instead they tend to follow in mom & dad’s footsteps. I didn’t really want to enter in the debate, so I guess my comment was just off topic, but thanks for addressing me.
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By Becca - Our Crazy Boys, May 14, 2010 @ 10:26 am
Wow… I wasn’t going to chime in, because it’s a little heated here, but then I thought, “Isn’t that why I should chime in?”
I remember when the song originally came out, and my son fell in love with it. He was 3, and my parent’s sent him the CD, and he fell in love with that. one. song.
I didn’t think too much about it. I didn’t care for it, but didn’t really think about it. Until he started singing it, in his little 3 year-old voice, and I about died.
I was raised using the “R” word to describe someone who was acting silly. Or stupid. I never really learned that it was hurtful until later in life. And since then, I have realized that people use that word a lot. A lot more than they should. It’s sad that they can’t think of a better word to describe what they really mean.
Good for you, Heather, for raising awareness. The world needs more people like you.
(And a side note… I am a speech therapist in a middle school. Do you know how many middle-schoolers use that word? I actually taught a lesson yesterday on synonyms for the “R” word. Words to say what you “really” mean instead of using the “R” word.)
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By Heather, May 14, 2010 @ 11:08 pm
I do agree that it is good of you to bring about awareness. As I mentioned, I had no clue about the original lyrics to the song. From this point on when any BEP song comes on the radio I will probably remember this post and will change the station (again we weren’t fans so no iPods to update).
I definitely also agree that we should treat each other with kindness, always. I can’t speak for anyone else, but I know that my children and I will not use hurtful words, even if it’s the “in” thing to do or hopefully even in a knee jerk reaction.
When my girls first heard the “R” word and asked me about it, we had an immediate conversation about not using that word. Being inquisitive they asked why, I explained that although the word was once used to describe people with disabilities it became hurtful over the years.
Then the nurse in me went on to explain some of the more well known disabilities such as CP, DS, and at a level they would understand-what causes them. They are aware of a button on my blog in regards to a family hoping to adopt two beautiful little girls with DS and are as heartbroken as I am to the future the girls face if not adopted along with many other children in that country. I am confident that as a mom and good person, that I’ve done my part to stop the spread of the “R” word in my little corner of the world.
Going back to kindness though, I have to speak up for Tracy again. She explained clearly that the word was offensive, that she and her children do not use that word and right or wrong explained where that particular slang term came from. For that she had some pretty mean things said to/about her. She is deserves better than that. I don’t know what else to say…
.-= Heather´s last blog ..and now an important message… =-.
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By Jen, May 15, 2010 @ 7:51 am
Heather, you have twice defended tracyM here, the first time saying “If you know Tracy at all” – so apparently you do know her. It sounds like she must be a nice person and that’s great. I hope so.
These people here – they don’t know her. They have no background knowledge, they have only her comment on this post. So you’re saying that 2 women who have told us they have disabled children, and (because I know HER background) 1 who has no children BUT a disabled neice, those women should be more kind to tracyM?
I don’t want to be ugly here, but really. But did you READ what has happened to Lisa’s daughter?
“But hey, if you’d like to talk to my 17-year-old daughter, who has been laughed at, teased, bullied, physically attacked, spat on, fed dirt, and nearly escaped molestation – come on over. Come and sit down with her, and tell her TO HER FACE that the word the kids throw at her to hurt her feelings, the word that she has come home crying over more times than I can count, the word that makes her feel ashamed and stupid and worthless – is really just for fun and means ‘CAREFREE DANCING’. Come and tell her that, if you think it’s no big deal. Look my daughter in the face and see if it’s still just dancing.”
It’s horrible. Horrible! And you’ve expressed concern twice now over tracyM’s feelings, but not once have you acknowledged this woman and her disabled child’s pain and struggle. I think SHE deserves better than that, too.
tracyM did explain what the word is slang for, I agree. But since the author already did that, I don’t know why another explanation was necessary, and her first words were “I am a BEP fan and will continue to be.” So basically I know this is a bad and hurtful word but I think me not repeating it is good enough, and I’ll continue to support them with my money and rock out to their music. You REALLY can’t see how that would feel like a slap in the face of a woman who has been through what the other commenters have been through? You really think that they should sit at their tables, across from their children who have been slapped with a label and tormented their entire lives and then read tracyM’s words and have nothing but a kind reaction? You must be one hell of a woman, because I know I couldn’t do that. And I sure as hell won’t be sitting in judgement of those who do. I think they’ve been through enough already. I’d imagine those words hit them like a punch in the gut because that’s how they hit me, and I don’t have a diabled child looking back at me, magnifying that feeling.
So yeah, it is kind of you to take up for tracyM again. But I think that everyone else is going the route of being kind by taking up for the disabled children. The women who responded to her are hurt, and I think that pain is pretty obvious. I think some kindness is due there, too.
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By Phyllis, December 30, 2010 @ 9:54 am
I did not know this about the original version of this song but to disregard all of their music seems harsh in my opinion. I think many people used the R word inappropriately 8-10 years ago and since then we have all learned how hurtful it can be to those with special needs and their families. All I am saying is that I believe we should entertain the idea that they may have been misinformed and insensitive but in the past 8 years may have come to understand the ramifications of throwing that word around. I know I have corrected my nieces and nephews who have used that word. It does not mean they are ALL bad or I should no longer speak to them. It simply means that they grew up in a culture where that word has been thrown around carelessly and they have picked it up. I am not a HUGE BEP fan by any stretch but I would like to look into this more before making a blanket statement about them. Just another “heated” opinion from a mom of two special needs boys!
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Heather - Hopelessly Flawed Reply:
January 3rd, 2011 at 9:51 am
And if they apologized, I might agree with you. But since they are publicly standing by their lyrics, I’m standing by my disdain as well.
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By Eric E. Johnson, July 24, 2011 @ 3:58 pm
Thanks for being bothered by this and writing about it. I too am bothered. And I have to say I’m especially vexed that more people aren’t bothered by it. The constant outpouring of admiration for the Black Eyed Peas is a continual disappointment to me. Every once in a while, I google “‘black eyed peas’ retarded apology” to see if they’ve made any effort to acknowledge regret at having celebrated hateful language with song. As you noted, it’s been a long time waiting.
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